Just as I am

Sacred Space once again reaches my spirit and draws me to a peaceful place.

In the Spiritual Exercises, St. Ignatius writes: “I will stand for the space of an Our Father, a step or two before the place where I am to meditate or contemplate, and with my mind raised on high, consider that God our Lord beholds me. Then I will make an act of reverence or humility” This is a beautiful and simple way of entering sacred space. I am not alone with my thoughts and feelings. God is here with me. So I can say to him, ‘Here I am, Lord’. Let me repeat this inwardly several times. Here I am, Lord. Here I am, in this place, for this day. Here I am, Lord, as I am, just as I am, not as I feel I ought to be. No, here I am, just as I am, with all my real thoughts, real feelings, real worries and concerns, and also my deeper wishes and desires. I come before you Lord just as I am.

It is Mother's Day and I am grateful that my own Mom is alive and I am so Blessed to have her in my life. She has been a source of strength and wisdom and my prayer is that I would not be focused on my own deep wounds today but full of grace and adoration for my Mom. It is a day to honor those who have brought a life into this world and I very much want to do that with a heart of peace.

The memories of my Mom go back to childhood. I have a memory of her lying in a hammock we used to have in our backyard where she would lay in the summertime enjoying the sun. I always thought she was so beautiful and still do. I can picture her raking leaves in the fall and shoveling snow in the winter with energy and beauty. She has such a comforting way about her and I remember how she would tickle my arm during church and I would snuggle in to listen to the sermon on Sundays up in the balcony of First United Methodist.

We went on so many wonderful walks during my teenage years and would often stop at the village doughnut shop to share a treat together. She would occasionally take me to breakfast before school at the restaurant by our house and we would chat and enjoy our time together a great deal. She was a wonderful listener and would let me talk about anything and everything. She helped me in so many ways. One time she even reached into a toilet to pull out my notecards that I had dropped by accident for the speech contest I was participating in!

It is a time today for me to remember the good and wonderful quailties that my Mom has. No one is perfect but love overlooks so many things. The love between a Mother and a Child can sometimes be like that.

I believe that God also knows me as I am and accepts me for who I am. My hope rests in Him. I am blessed that He gave me a Mom who taught me so much and she has shown me God's love through her concern and care.